Sad

I kinda feel i'm fighting this battle alone. Can anyone feel as vividly as me, how spiritually lukewarm this YF has become? yet somehow, in my quest, I have yet to find someone who shares this feeling. Perhaps my shepherd (whom I suspect will be reading this quite soon) is the only one I know about so far who shares this understanding.

I feel that i'm filling a role that i'm not yet mature to fill. Yet if I don't fill this role, nobody would. But yet, i'm not fully mature to fill it. Like, I have always been in the shelter of older bros and siss in Christ. Suddenly, with Lionel and Andy leaving...suddenly i'm the third oldest guy who attends YF regularly. Desmond is hanging around for awhile.. but he'll probably be in YAF soon enough. As will most of hte people who are currently older than me.. Even Li Jin.

I pray that Lionel will come back soon. Jeff too. Andy as well...

I pray that God will give me the strength... the strength to do what I need to.. The strength to make a difference. The maturity too.